The Chicken or the Egg?
by Baby Kat Snophlake
Summary: Our favorite ToV characters answer the age-old question: "Which came first? The Chicken or the Egg?" This was an assignment for The 500 and I thought it was good, so...


**EDIT-A/N:** For those who have already reviewed, thank you, I truly appreciate your feedback. But if you are new to this story, please do not review unless you have **constructive criticism** to give me. I don't want to be told how good I am or how much I sucked if you don't have a reason for saying so. I'd rather you say nothing at all if you can't tell me why you liked or hated something. If I am out of character, if my writing sucks, if my plot sucks, if my description sucks, if my dialogue sucks, if my style sucks, if my vocabulary sucks, if I'm not interesting you, if I put in a deal-breaker, if I irritated a pet peeve, if I am missing something, if I don't meet expectation, if you think I have potential but have too much to say, if you wish I had done something--anything-- differently, if you just plain hate what I've done with a character, plot, action, description, suspense, if I failed at an attempt at using a writing tool, if I have spelling errors, if I repeat words, if I use the wrong word, if the first sentence didn't grab your attention and you want to hit the back button, if I have grammar errors, or any kind of errors at all for that matter, if something is wrong or doesn't feel right and you just can't put your finger on it, if you hate my title or summary, even if all you can say is, "you want to know why, but I'm not sure so I can't tell you. It just doesn't work" **with a copy of the quote that doesn't work for you**, please do me the honor of telling me so, even if it's in the form of an email, PM, or review, I don't care how you do it, just tell me. Yes, I am begging for concrit. But please don't leave feedback that simply says "that was good. Nice job." I want to know the **why**. Thank you.

A/N: As I said, this is January 9th's assignment for The 500 and I actually liked it so I's posting.

EDIT: Looking back, though... most of these could've been a LOT better. You can tell where I got lazy, but I still think my favorites are still the Karol/Rita combo, Zagi, and the Tweedles. I might update these someday to be more fitting.

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**The Chicken or the Egg?**

**By Baby Kat Snophlake**

Which came first? The chicken or the egg?

Yuri: Heh, thinking about that will give you a headache. Sorry, but I like functioning without a migraine. I'll save you a panacea bottle, though.

Yuri (2): Does this really matter right now?! I don't have time for this. Ask me again when the world is saved and nobody is suffering.

Flynn: Well, I haven't thought about it… Is this something you need help with? You see, I'm on a pilgrimage…

Witcher: Well, I'll answer to the best of my ability but this isn't really my specialty…

Sodia: I'd be more concerned if the chicken or the egg were abiding by the laws of the empire. Let me know if they become wanted, I'll keep my eyes peeled and carry out the required punishment if needed. Until then, I'm following my Captain's orders and they don't include answering a question like that.

Raven: Eh? Askin' questions like that will only confuse this old man. Why don't you ask someone younger so I can follow Judith Darlin' to the hot springs?

Karol: Well, I've recorded the egg and the chicken, but I only know how to fight them. I couldn't tell you anything about which came first. Why not ask Rita? She's the know-it-all…

Rita: Why are you asking me?! How the hell should I know?

Estelle: Hmm… That's an interesting question. I'm not sure that I've read the answer in any book that I have, but maybe if we checked in the texts of the Ancients. Oh! I should go to Aspio and see what I can find! If we can't find anything there, we can always try Myorzo.

Judith: I suppose the egg would, but I don't really know. I much prefer fighting over answering philosophical questions. I suppose you could ask the Elder if you really want to know.

Krityan Elder: Hmph… Well, I'm going for my walk, meet me at my house, and we'll discuss it when I get back.

Ba'ul ((translated by Judith)): Ask Repede. He's the only one that truly knows…

Repede: Woof! Woof woof woof woof! WOOF!

Yeager: You should be less worried about which came first and more worried about staying out of my way lest you don't survive this encounter.

Gauche and Droite: We don't have time for stupid questions!

Clint: The chicken and its egg are nothing but monsters! They deserve to be killed right along with the rest of them! All monsters must die!

Tison: Are you siding with the chicken and the egg? If so, you must die, too.

Nan: This area is under the jurisdiction of the Hunting Blades, clear out and quit asking questions or I'll be forced to annihilate you!

Zagi: Who cares?! Kill the chicken!

Duke: That does not concern you.

Phaeroh: That is something only humans would waste their time on.

Kaufman: The question should actually be, "how much is the chicken and the egg?" I'll buy them if I can sell them and make a profit.

Khroma: I don't think that's the most important thing to ponder right now. I'd rather you do something more productive. Such as stopping _him_.

Alexei: The chicken will play its part well, however, I'm afraid the egg is useless and must be destroyed.

Ragou: Chickens and eggs? I should round them up when they don't pay taxes and feed them to my beloved pets, because obviously they don't stand a chance at taking down my Rhybgaro, HAHAHAH!

Cumore: I won't waste my time on such bothersome questions. I'd rather just send the chicken and the egg out into the desert to catch that damned dragon. If they die out there, then I suppose you'll be next, then, won't you?

Barbos: That question is beneath me! How dare you approach me to ask it? Kill them! Destroy them all before they interfere with my plans.

Natz: I'm sorry, but you do not have permission to ask the Duce at this time. I'd be more than happy to schedule an appointment during the Night of the New Moon.

Belius: I don't know if your fate would be swayed by such knowledge, but--

Don Whitehorse: Why you coming ta me for the answer? This is something ya should figure out fer yerself. Ya need ta learn ta stand on your own two feet.

Teagle: Why worry about that?! The egg has been kidnapped! I hope Yuri can save it before the chicken misses her egg!

Hanks: Well, here's some supplies so you can go find out. In the meantime, I'll hold down the fort here.

Leblanc: Oh, uh… well, if you're not in any danger, I have orders. We have a fugitive to find…

Adecor: I say, the chicken did! An egg can't be laid without the chicken!

Boccos: You idiot! The chicken can't just pop out of nowhere, it has to come from an egg! Of course the egg came first.

Adecor: I say, you're wrong! Without the chicken the egg wouldn't exist!

Boccos: No, you're wrong! A chicken comes from an egg so obviously…


End file.
